Fallen Angels
by twilightmadfans
Summary: Summary- two shot, sad and depressing. Bella is forced to make a horrible decision. Will she regret it? Dnt read if you are to emotional
1. My End

Fallen Angels 

Summary- One shot, sad and depressing. Bella is forced to make a horrible decision. Will she regret it?

Isabella Marie Swan. _Yep! _That's me.

My life meant nothing to me, I mean what was I. who was I?

I didn't even know the day or time for god sake. I was sitting on the edge of my bed cradling my stomach. …

_Why? Why me, what had I done to deserve this? _

I couldn't cope, my body wasn't functioning, and I wasn't functioning. Even if I was live, I didn't know it. I was a shell, a nothing. I mean I had a beating heart but that was it, my life was over. Nothing can help me.

I mean look at myself I have resorted to locking myself in my bedroom. And staring of into space. That's my life now, lying on my hard wooden floor, cradling my knees to my chest and just lying there, when I wasn't lying there I slept but that was it.

I couldn't even cry any more. I had counted how long it had been since he had left me.

…………. 16 weeks, 3 days, 11 hours, 13 minutes, and 23, seconds ago. …

It had been that long I had been like this. It was him, he left me I was alone now and I couldn't cope, he kept me safe and protected me.. he was the reason I was breathing and the only thing I cared about. He was heart and soul. He kept it beating. Then he left. With no explanation. Him my lover left with my family and my best friend Alice.

How could she leave?

I thought I new them but that was it, I clearly didn't. How could they do this to me? Even Esme, my mother how could she? .

At first I was angry but now I can't feel anything.

Still with this heartbreak, he leaves me in this hopeless state. How am I going to cope. I can't cope. I am seventeen for Christ sake.

I can't look after a baby, let alone a half vampire baby.

I had found out my baby was a little girl.

I really didn't see any reason in going on. I new it was selfish on my baby but I really couldn't. at least we would die together.

I grabbed a pen and paper and began to write two letters, to be honest they were suicide notes but I would like to see them as my final goodbye to the people I loved.

I took the first bit of paper and began to write.

_Mum and Dad, _

_Sorry to leave you like this, but I truly don't believe there is a way out. My life if I could call it that is not bearable. I am not even living, I am holding on to air my body doesn't want, every breath I take hurts, every second I am here it hurts. I just want the pain to go. Also I sorry for doing this but I feel you have a right to know from me, I don't want you finding out from some doctor when I am long gone. _

_I am pregnant, and yes dad it is Edwards's baby, but he won't find out until he read his letter. The Cullen's don't know anything. And dad before you grab your gun, which you are properly doing as reading this, this is not Edwards fault. He left me yes. But that is not the reason I am ending mine and my babies life. School is unbearable, the girls I can't stand. It everything, I am in so much pain and this is the only way out. Writing this letter to you is the last bit of dignity I have left so please respect my descion, in time you will understand why? But I want you to promise me one thing this is all I can ask. Don't blame yourselves and don't blame the Cullen especially Edward. He is my life and you know that especially you dad. I am sorry for having to put you through this and taking away your only daughter and grand daughter. _

_I decided to call the baby Esmarenna Carley Cullen. From Renee and Esme and then Carlisle and Charlie for the second name. the name is pronounced (Es-ma-re-na)_

_I was only 14 weeks pregnant so not that far gone hey? _

_I guess that is all I can say, except that I am really so sorry and that I will always love you. The best parents in the world. _

_Love your daughter Isabella, love you always. _

And then I grabbed my second piece of paper.

_Cullen's, _

_I am sorry, firstly this isn't your fault, and you can't blame your selves for this. Even though you didn't love me and you left me I will always love you, you were and always will be my family my being and my life. _

_Carlisle and Esme, my mother and father. You know I love you and you were so kind to me. Emmet and Jasper, the brothers I never had, always embarrassing me at any opportunity you had, you are always with me. Alice my best friend you know I love you and you know what I feel. I guess that is all I can say, oh and Rosalie a protective sister I never had. We had our differences. But I love you too and finally Edward, my life and soul, you kept me going, even though you left I never will stop loving you unconditionally. Me and your unborn child. I called her Esmarenna Carley Cullen. From Renee and Esme and then Carlisle and Charlie for the second name. The name is pronounced (Es-ma-re-na)_

_I was only 14 weeks pregnant so not that far gone hey? _

_Ask Charlie and René for more information, in the letter there is a scan of the baby. I am so sorry that I had to kill her along with me, but being alone, with a abnormal baby growing inside me you know what I mean, I was scared and alone I am sorry and will forever love you. At my funeral if it was alright with you I want you all to attend and on my tombstone I want my name to be Isabella Marie Swann Cullen. _

_Love you for eternity literally _

_You're Bella. x_

I folded the Letter in to there correct envelopes and left them on my desk.

I then took back the pills and a bottle of vodka. I gunned the pills down my throat and gulped the vodka down, I smashed the vodka bottle and grabbed for a piece of glass, I seared it across each of my wrists until I was bleeding uncontrollably. I lay down on the floor and slipped into a black sea of unconscious.

Finally as my senses let go, I was happy, the pain was fading and I was at peace for ever with my memories of Edward and my baby to keep me company. If this was death I gladly took it.

I died on the 18th of December me and my baby. 17 years old.

I was forever at peace and watching over my 7 angels for eternity.

Tell me should I continue and do Bella funeral and Charlie's and the Cullen's points of view? Tell what you think.

Twilightmadfans x


	2. Always and Forever

Fallen Angels

Hey guys this was a one shot but now a two. I thought I would finish this and it would be extra long as my other story's are going to have to wait for a bit. This is because I am going to be a beta reader for the marvellous TeamRobbiePattz and maybe Twilightlovefans, she hasn't actually sent me anything yet. Hope you enjoy and remember review.

Chapter 2 : The Funeral.

How had it come to this?

My beautiful Bella lying dead in a wooden box, why did I let this happen. Such an innocent life...

She felt like she was alone. Like she had no one to turn to and worst of all she died thinking no one loved her that she was all alone, but she couldn't have been more wrong. Of course I love her I have loved from the moment I first saw her in that biology class, now she has been ripped away from me.

She told me not to blame my self but how can I not, she is my life. I have no meaning without her. And she was pregnant with my child. My baby. My wife and I killed them. I killed them both. She killed herself out of my doing.

But she thought this was the only way to fuel her body with vodka and drugs.

I got of her bed and smashed the vodka bottle in my hands.

Carlisle and Esme didn't know yet, nor did Rosalie or Emmet. Alice had a vision about 23 hours ago and we got here as fast as we could.

But we were too late, she was already gone. I didn't even get a chance to tell her I love her one final time. That's the worse part she thought I, Edward Cullen didn't love her.

God my mother she is going to die, not literally but her dead heart is going to burst as well as my poor father, I have lost a love and child. But they have lost their youngest daughter; Carlisle was more protective than Charlie sometimes.

Charlie had found her and had called Alice. That's when we all came down. Charlie didn't hate me, he new from the minute I saw her I loved her. He was grieving as were so many other people. Renee and Phil were flying out and would arrive soon; Alice had also informed the other of our loss.

We were all desperately worried. Esme had run, faster than ever. To get to Bella. We weren't aloud to see her though, not till we said our final good byes on the day of the funeral. ….

2 day later .. The day of the Funeral.

Epov.

Today was it. The day we were to say goodbye to my lover for ever. I was dressed in my prom suit, the one I had danced with her in. it was still full of her scent. I also was holding onto a jumper of hers. She always wore it. I hated it, so did Alice but she loved it. I brought to my face and inhaled the scent.

We were all waiting in the private room, in the coroners' office. Through those double doors was my Bella. Lying in a box. Dead.

Charlie, Renee, Phil and my family had come to say their goodbyes. Charlie new Bella saw Carlisle and seem as her second mum and dad, she loved them dearly.

As well as Alice, rose, Jasper and Emmet being her sibling she also loved.

And I being her on true love that never will stop loving her.

Phil and my siblings were saying their goodbyes. When they came out the doors they just sat silently.

Jasper thought _Edward im so sorry, she was my sister all of us loved her, are you sure you want to go in their. _

I blocked out all thoughts. Esme and Carlisle went in next along with Renee and Charlie. I heard sobs from the room, they were in their for a good half an hour before all four dead looking people emerged from the room and sat back down. They were truly grief stricken.

Finally it was my turn but I didn't move. I was frozen, until I felt a hand on my shoulder. It was Esme.

"Go darling, go and say goodbye'"

I got up and hugged my mother. I walked to the double doors and stopped.

For a brief moment, I walked in and straight up the caskit.

It was a white marble one. There was a chair next to it and a let down side so you could reach the 'corpse' easily.

I went over and their was my beautiful Bella. Looking elegant as usual. She was lying peacefully. She looked like she was asleep, Even though her face was a ghostly white. She was wearing a white blowy dress that came to just above her knee, it was spectacular. I dropped onto my knees next to the coffin. I grabbed her left hand and on her wedding finger I placed my mother's engagement ring on it. I then stood up and bought her hand to my mouth. And placed a single kiss on her knuckle.

I brushed her hair away from her angelic face. I bent down near her ear and whispered.

I love you always.

I bought my lips to hers. Pressed them to seal the space between us and inhaled her freesia scent. My mouth lingered on hers as my knees dropped to the floor so did my mouth I kneeled and my face buried into her stomach. I grabbed her hands and held them to my heart. My body convulsed with sobs and I stayed there for god knows how long before I felt someone bring their hand to my shoulder.

"Come on son, its time to let her go" Charlie said in a roar voice from crying. I let him slightly drag me up then he pulled me into a hug. One last look at my Bella then we all walked and ascended into the church. Their were over 200 people there to pay respects to Bella.

As people waited behind us. Charlie, I, Carlisle, Emmet, Phil and Jasper were getting into place to carry Bella's coffin. With Charlie and Carlisle at the front then me behind Charlie and followed by Jasper. On the opposite side Carlisle was followed by Phil and Emmet.

As we picked up the coffin. Alice Rose Esme and René walked in front of the huge crowd who would follow us to wear Bella would be buried. As we slowly started walking the song Your Beautiful by James Blunt came on.

(here the link to the song as your reading listen) .com/watch?v=RlG99v4_kXQ

_My life is brilliant _

_My life is brilliant _

_My love is pure _

_I saw an angel of that im sure _

_She smiled at me on the subway_

_She was with another man _

_But I won't loose no sleep at night coz_

_I've got a plan_

This was true, i nearly collapsed listening to the song, everyone was crying now we proceeded as we neared the place wear she would be lowered.

_You're beautiful _

_You're beautiful _

_You're beautiful it's true._

_I saw your face in a crowded place _

_And I don't know what to do _

_Coz I'll never be with you_

Everyone gathered around the ground and we began to lower her into the ground.

Once she was safely in the ground. Everyone was silent, listening to the song she loved as a child as it showed her life and her with mine, my family stood at the front with hers while other just crowded round the back to watch and say goodbye to there Bella. I knelt down and stared into the ground at the coffin that held my darling.

_Yeah she caught my eye _

_As I walked on by _

_She could see from my face _

_That I was _

_Fuckin high _

_And I don't think that I'll _

_See her again _

_But we shared a moment _

_That will last till thee end_

_You're beautiful _

_You're beautiful _

_You're beautiful it's true._

_I saw your face in a crowded place _

_And I don't know what to do _

_Coz I'll never be with you_

_Naa daaa naaa daaaaaa _

_You're beautiful _

_You're beautiful _

_You're beautiful it's true._

_There must be an angel _

_With a smile on her face _

_When she thought up that _

_I should be with you _

_But its time to face the truth.._

_I will never be with you._

As the song ended there was so much truth to it. The vicar cremated her body to the ground and people said there respects.

We were about to go and celebrate her life at her wake. Charlie came to grab my arm again.

"I would wish to stay here with Bella please"

"Are you sure Edward?" he asked worried

"Please" I whispered.

I knew my eyes would be filled with hurt, loss and guilt as I looked at my family. And Charlie.

They knew how in love we were. As they walked away. I stood back as Bella's grave was filled in and her headstone was placed. Once done I sat my self next the head stone leaning against it.

1989-2007

Isabella Marie Swann Cullen

A daughter, sister, friend and mother to be.

Always with us.

Such an innocent life

In our hearts till the end and after

One true love forever.

Rest in Peace.

That's what her headstone said, she had changed her name to Cullen even though we weren't married.

I still had her jumper in my hand. I lay my head on the cool slab staring at the headstone. I was lying own now I took out a small ring from my pocket along with a small glass tube. This ring belonged to Bella. I placed the ring on my finger. I bought the glass tube to my mouth then her jumper. I inhaled her scent until I was in blackness.

We are finally at peace, my _fallen angel._

So what did you think? Please review.

Carlisle had got this poison in his possessions from the volturi years ago when he worked for their guard. This was to be drank or forced orally and it would kill the venom instally. And then the human within the vampire would resurface and be dead.

So they died together in the end.

Please tell me I it was good or bad.

-Twilightmadfans xxxcxxxxxx


	3. Chapter 3: I will see you again

Fallen Angels

_Alice's point of view_

I couldn't actually believe it when I first found out. It was such a shock to the whole of the family even Rosalie was devastated. Rose didn't hate Bella, but she was still angry even now at Bella, the one thing Rose would do anything in the world for is to have her humanity back, she'd love to be human again and be able to have innocence again, to be able to grow and fall in love have children and watch her grandchildren grow. But this was all a past dream now. She would never be able to go back and what caused her the most anger is that Bella took hers own life and threw it down the drain. You'd think this was the worst but over all this the greatest depression that caused Rosalie such heartache was the fact that Bella had to kill herself and her innocent little girl, our niece, due to our family's departure from her life.

It causes me so much grief to even think about the pain Bella must have been feeling at that time in her life and to find out she was pregnant with a vampire baby with no one to turn to, must have been so scary. She couldn't exactly go too a normal doctor and say "Hey, Im pregnant with a vampires baby" they would of committed her to an asylum like where I had to spend the last of my human years. I had no memory of this and was grateful in fact, the kind of things you here about that went on in those places especially back then, I would be scarred for my entire existence. I would have had a niece and Esme has lost a child all over again, I know how lost she is without Bella.

We had all gone to the funeral and said our goodbyes, when I walked into that room I collapsed in sobs on the floor. I couldn't handle it, but I needed to be strong for my family. She looked still elegant even dead; she caused us all to worry about her. She was the key to this family, to all our hearts and now that door can never be locked and kept safe because the key is lost forever and that is how we will always be. Tear filled my eyes, tears that could never fall, tears that I wanted to fall, I wanted all the pain I was given I wanted it because I was partly to blame for this beautiful angels death, she was just a girl. Never selfish Just a girl. A girl that was my best friend and forever will be. I can never forgive myself but even now she proves she is one unique person, as my brothers, father and husband helped carry bellas coffin I couldn't take it in, it still doesn't seem realistic, I want so badly for someone to scream in to my face and wake me up from some sort of horrible dream, even though I couldn't sleep. I wanted this to be a nightmare, but in reality it was a living nightmare and we all dissevered the pain, every single one of us. Time had passed so slowly from the moment Bella had been force out of our lives.

Seeing Renee and Charlie loosing their daughter, is the most heart wrenching thing in the world, it feels like I have lost a daughter. We were so close but it just proves what a cold heartless monster Edward states we all are, I left her to die, we should have knew she wouldn't survive without us or Edward, esphsichally Edward. He is the one most affected and we didn't know if he could go on, but we would support him in all we could. I couldn't even imagine what would happen to me if I lost my mate Jasper.

As I sat in the wake, which was meant to be a celebration of Bellas life, how any one could be sitting here, getting drunk while I was morning my angel's death was beyond me, but it got me thinking. I began listing all my memories of my little Bella.

My first vision of her and me becoming friends.

Meeting in the kitchen for the first time.

Smelling her blood but resisting and her laughing it off.

Dressing her up, my disgust in her clothes

Saving her from James and so many more times with her cute smile, always at us.

I decided overlook a song that I new would make me feel even sadder but every word in it was true, of my feelings to my little human friend, my best friend, my fallen angel.

((A/N when reading the lyrics listen to the song 'ill see you again' cover by westlife))

Always you will be part of me  
And I will forever feel your strength  
When I need it most

You're gone now, gone but not forgotten  
I can't say this to your face  
But I know you hear

Chorus:  
I'll see you again  
You never really left  
I feel you walk beside me  
I know I'll see you again

When I'm lost, when I'm missing you like crazy  
I tell myself I'm so blessed  
To have had you in my life, my life

Chorus:  
I'll see you again  
You never really left  
I feel you walk beside me  
I know I'll see you again

When I had the time to tell you  
Never thought I'd live to see the day

When the words I should have said  
Would come to haunt me  
In my darkest hour I tell myself  
I'll see you again

Chorus:  
I'll see you again  
You never really left  
I feel you walk beside me  
I know I'll see you again

Someday I'll see you again

I'll see you again  
You never really left  
I feel you walk beside me  
I know I'll see you again

I'll see you again  
I'll see you again

I miss you like crazy

You're gone but not forgotten  
I'll never forget you

Someday I'll see you again

I feel you walk beside me  
Never leave you, yeah

Gone but not forgotten

I feel you by my side  
No this is not goodbye x 3  
I'll See You Again

_It was true I would see them both again……_


End file.
